Saturday, June 25, 2011
Forgiveness Snobbery
I was recalling a recent get together with a friend. I was thinking to myself-I wonder why this friend even enjoys my company? I am honest with her and sometimes I offend her. Then it hit me: she has to forgive me. I know something about forgiveness. I have studied it. I have prayed over it. I have practiced it-a lot. I am so busy thinking about giving it that I forgot something very important: I need it. I have a relative who is always gracious to me no matter the circumstance. I was thinking-how can they always be gracious? And it hits me: they have to forgive ME.I am a forgiveness snob! I can see how I have to keep forgiving people, but then I realize, I constantly need it, too. Why is this a new concept? Do I think I am perfect? Uh, no..definitely not. I have a tendency to say exactly what is on my mind. I am pretty transparent and people usually know where they stand with me. I see my flaws very clearly. I just never saw myself as needing to be forgiven by people I interact with. I understand where I am coming from, and, obviously, I agree with my words and actions...and yet, I can see that being honest can sometimes hurt people, and being myself may cause someone to feel less than good. And that is where I can see the forgiveness coming from. These people who truly love me....family members...friends....acquaintances....they overlook these flaws and choose to continue to be in my life for one very simple reason: they forgive me. They may have had to forgive me many, many times, and in my arrogance, I was only thinking that I have to forgive. I realize I have to be forgiven and I am grateful to the kind, gracious souls who forgive me. May I one day be worthy enough (though I doubt this, since I am human) that I no longer need to be forgiven so much. Don't be a forgiveness snob! Is there someone you need to forgive? Do you need to look at yourself introspectively and see if you need someone's forgiveness? Thanks to God that grace allows forgiveness of all of us-and makes this world a better and kinder place to dwell.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Little Girls and the Daddies Who Love Them
This blog's inception comes at 1:48 a.m. and refuses to leave me alone until I write it all out and post if for you to read. It is inspired by a recent Father's Day Holiday, but really that was just the impetus for thinking about my observations of dads.
My husband and I became parents in an unexpected way. We were very young and just sort of stumbling through life.I think that is why God chose to send us an experienced baby first. Now for me, mothering came as easy as breathing-in fact, I don't think I was fully breathing until I met Lyndon Leigh Schnelle. She did take my breath away and greatly let my breathing with her become very natural I bonded very easily with Lyndi, gave care to her, nurtured her, introduced her to clothing, hair accessories and food.Her dad was in Graduate School and he nurtured her too, but in very different ways: my husband liked to have fun, though, and so he creatively found ways to have fun while hanging out with his new little daughter. He took her to tennis matches when she was only two. He bought her little tennis outfits and shoes-okay, mostly in pink, but still, gifts for Lyndi to utilize as she learned to walk and hold a little racket. He enjoyed watching cartoons: "The Smurfs" were popular in the early 80's and so evolved a little slumber party where daddy would pull out the living room sofa into a bed, and daddy would get his big pillow and Lyndi would get her little pillow and they as would camp out and talk and giggle, then drift off to sleep, and wake early for donuts and The Smurfs. They loved watching it and I loved watching them. John encouraged Lyndi to try new things and embrace many things.
As we left Grad School and found a new job, a new daughter was added to our family. This little girl, Laura Beth, was nurtured and influenced by not only mom, not only dad, but big sister as well. Even though Laura had mom and sis to do things with, her daddy made sure that there were some things that he sculpted into his schedule that included just him and Laura. He read to her frequently, and not just children's stories, but also deeper texts, which didn't mean a lot to Laura at the time, but the close proximity and soothing voice of her daddy made her respond and smile to prose and poetry. They both began fostering a love of cooking at about the same time and had lots of fun learning and trying new concoctions. They both liked to try unusual techniques for the family Easter Egg Dying, they both liked to find fountains and pyrotechnics at Independance Day Celebrations. Dad eventually turned the lighting of the fuses over to Laura-she became the official Lighter of the Fireworks for our family.They began some very creative carvings of pumpkins and they would find scary movies just the pair of them like to watch together.
Another little baby girl was added to this family of females. Jordan Layne would spend many evenings lying on her daddy's knees watching basketball and tennis. John liked to sing to Jordan and she would be soothed and entertained by that, and she in return liked to perform for him and others. Jordan accompanied her dad to meetings and he took her to the Dr. since mom was at work. He learned how to make a little toddler girl comfortable when she was sick and to load her favorite movies. So it was quite a fascinating time watching these children participate in these different activities, thought up by a man who hadn't spent a lot of time with baby girls, and made ways for them to socialize together.
Now as adult women, you can still see that Lyndi likes to watch certain things with her dad, as does her sisters. Lyndi has branched out to have many interests as a creative professional young woman. Laura loves prose and poetry and is a very talented piano player and singer and often gathers the family around the piano to sing all types of music. I still hear Laura and her dad making plans for when they can get together to watch a favorite tv series, and when they do watch it...just the two of them...they discuss things, reason together, laugh and talk. Jordan has enjoyed games of pick up with her dad and he has watched her league playing of basketball, softball and tennis. The whole family enjoys a good tennis match and Jordan has recently introduced her husband to tennis. They purchased new rackets and balls and are ready to play .At game time, Jordan and her dad like to be team mates because they think so much alike. I notice whenever our girls are home or around for the day, they always go to seek out their dad, to say hello and goodbye. I notice every evening my husband inquires about each of his daughters, wants to know what is going on that day in their lives, if they are all o.k and then can go relax after he gets all the information on them. Men don't need to hear about every little detail or talk hours about the day, they just want to know that these little girls they care so very much about are okay.
What a privilege to be part of all their lives and have been able to peer into this sacred and precious relationship of a big, strong man who melts at the mere "Hello" of his precious daughters, and these beautiful, independent women who make the time to come home to see their dad, talk with him, give him gifts, play tennis and games together, go get sodas and just hang out.
Jordan and Lance have recently let John know that he will be a grandfather. He shakes his head at all the plans I am making, but I know once that little being enters his life, he will find all new things too find ways to connect to this child-whom I hope one day will come to know what a precious jewel his grandfather is! I look forward to watching their relationship grow.
My husband and I became parents in an unexpected way. We were very young and just sort of stumbling through life.I think that is why God chose to send us an experienced baby first. Now for me, mothering came as easy as breathing-in fact, I don't think I was fully breathing until I met Lyndon Leigh Schnelle. She did take my breath away and greatly let my breathing with her become very natural I bonded very easily with Lyndi, gave care to her, nurtured her, introduced her to clothing, hair accessories and food.Her dad was in Graduate School and he nurtured her too, but in very different ways: my husband liked to have fun, though, and so he creatively found ways to have fun while hanging out with his new little daughter. He took her to tennis matches when she was only two. He bought her little tennis outfits and shoes-okay, mostly in pink, but still, gifts for Lyndi to utilize as she learned to walk and hold a little racket. He enjoyed watching cartoons: "The Smurfs" were popular in the early 80's and so evolved a little slumber party where daddy would pull out the living room sofa into a bed, and daddy would get his big pillow and Lyndi would get her little pillow and they as would camp out and talk and giggle, then drift off to sleep, and wake early for donuts and The Smurfs. They loved watching it and I loved watching them. John encouraged Lyndi to try new things and embrace many things.
As we left Grad School and found a new job, a new daughter was added to our family. This little girl, Laura Beth, was nurtured and influenced by not only mom, not only dad, but big sister as well. Even though Laura had mom and sis to do things with, her daddy made sure that there were some things that he sculpted into his schedule that included just him and Laura. He read to her frequently, and not just children's stories, but also deeper texts, which didn't mean a lot to Laura at the time, but the close proximity and soothing voice of her daddy made her respond and smile to prose and poetry. They both began fostering a love of cooking at about the same time and had lots of fun learning and trying new concoctions. They both liked to try unusual techniques for the family Easter Egg Dying, they both liked to find fountains and pyrotechnics at Independance Day Celebrations. Dad eventually turned the lighting of the fuses over to Laura-she became the official Lighter of the Fireworks for our family.They began some very creative carvings of pumpkins and they would find scary movies just the pair of them like to watch together.
Another little baby girl was added to this family of females. Jordan Layne would spend many evenings lying on her daddy's knees watching basketball and tennis. John liked to sing to Jordan and she would be soothed and entertained by that, and she in return liked to perform for him and others. Jordan accompanied her dad to meetings and he took her to the Dr. since mom was at work. He learned how to make a little toddler girl comfortable when she was sick and to load her favorite movies. So it was quite a fascinating time watching these children participate in these different activities, thought up by a man who hadn't spent a lot of time with baby girls, and made ways for them to socialize together.
Now as adult women, you can still see that Lyndi likes to watch certain things with her dad, as does her sisters. Lyndi has branched out to have many interests as a creative professional young woman. Laura loves prose and poetry and is a very talented piano player and singer and often gathers the family around the piano to sing all types of music. I still hear Laura and her dad making plans for when they can get together to watch a favorite tv series, and when they do watch it...just the two of them...they discuss things, reason together, laugh and talk. Jordan has enjoyed games of pick up with her dad and he has watched her league playing of basketball, softball and tennis. The whole family enjoys a good tennis match and Jordan has recently introduced her husband to tennis. They purchased new rackets and balls and are ready to play .At game time, Jordan and her dad like to be team mates because they think so much alike. I notice whenever our girls are home or around for the day, they always go to seek out their dad, to say hello and goodbye. I notice every evening my husband inquires about each of his daughters, wants to know what is going on that day in their lives, if they are all o.k and then can go relax after he gets all the information on them. Men don't need to hear about every little detail or talk hours about the day, they just want to know that these little girls they care so very much about are okay.
What a privilege to be part of all their lives and have been able to peer into this sacred and precious relationship of a big, strong man who melts at the mere "Hello" of his precious daughters, and these beautiful, independent women who make the time to come home to see their dad, talk with him, give him gifts, play tennis and games together, go get sodas and just hang out.
Jordan and Lance have recently let John know that he will be a grandfather. He shakes his head at all the plans I am making, but I know once that little being enters his life, he will find all new things too find ways to connect to this child-whom I hope one day will come to know what a precious jewel his grandfather is! I look forward to watching their relationship grow.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Happy Anniversary
On June 4th I celebrated my wedding anniversary. I remember back to my wedding day and it was happy and wonderful. But on this particular anniversary, I couldn't help thinking back to another day. A day 9 years ago, when it was my 25th anniversary. Our three daughters planned a surprise reception for us. They sang a song at church in the morning and announced that there would be a reception. They had planned some very special things, and they all participated in a very meaningful way. Our wedding colors were pink and blue, so they decorated in shades of blue with pink accents. They ordered a cake. Our youngest daughter made mints. Our middle daughter made a reception mix CD of all the songs that were significant to us. Our oldest daughter bought beautiful silver centerpieces and decorated the reception hall. Being the recipient of all this thoughtfulness was overwhelming, especially considering how young they all were. They displayed many photos of us dating, of our wedding and of our family as it has grown and changed. It was all so beautiful and lovely. Friends in the church helped serve and clean up the reception. I made a scrapbook of it all so we could remember and cherish the day. Without the wedding day, there would have been no other special anniversary day. The wedding day is just a beginning on a road full of happy and wonderful days. I thank our daughters not only for that incredibly thoughtful, beautiful surprise, but also for the kindness, caring, thoughtfulness, friendship and love that they show us every day. Lyndi, Laura and Jordan: you are the best!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)